thane July 11th, 2009
Tory was addressing a letter today, and I was reading her the zip code.
Dad: One!
Tory: One.
D: Five!
T: Five.
D: Two!
T: Two.
D: Two!
Stuart: Six.
T: Two.
D: Nine!
S: Six.
T: Nine.
Joh: Eighteen!
He comes by it naturally.
thane April 24th, 2009
Today with Stuart:
“When I was a cat and Mac was a Stuart, I scratched the carpet. But now I am a Stuart and I don’t scratch the carpet.”
thane March 20th, 2009
This morning, the children wanted (decaf) coffee with breakfast. After this was established, Joh tried to figure out what Stuart wanted for breakfast.
J: What do you want for breakfast, Stuart?
S: COFFEE!!!
J: What do you want to eat with your coffee?
S: BAR!!!*
(A few minutes pass)
J: What do you want for breakfast, Stuart?
S: COFFEE!!!
J: Do you want a fried egg sandwich with your coffee?
S: Uh, huh.
* Clif Cashew Nectar bars are Stuart’s favorite food, bar none.
thane January 29th, 2009
Stuart was acting out. Hitting and throwing things, nothing unusual. I decided to talk to him about it. Afterwards I was saying:
Dad: When we are angry, we can say “I’m angry!”
Stuart: I’m angry!
D: “I want to use my hands.”
S: I want to use my hands.
D: “I want to throw things.”
S: I want to throw things.
D: “I’m going to the playroom to throw my beanbags.”
S: I’m going to the playroom to throw my beanbags.
D: Those are all things we can say when we are angry, Stuart.
S: “Those are all things we can say, Stuart.”
thane January 7th, 2009
A short list of things Stuart did today.
Needless to say, it was a busy day.
thane January 6th, 2009
Tory: He kicked me!
Joh: And then you hit him.
Tory: No. I hit him first.
thane December 7th, 2008
“I want to be last.”
“OK.”
I go down the stairs and he closes the gate.
“I want to be first.”
“Oh, I’m sorry. I thought when you said that you wanted to be last that you wanted to be last.”
thane October 25th, 2008
So, we had the Relativelies over for dinner tonight. At one point, Clio is going around yelling “Stuart! Where is Stuart!” To which most people are responding “Not here.”
Anyway, so Joh goes next door to return some plates and stuff to the Neighborlies While she is chatting with Wendy, a little voice calls out “Hi, Momma.” Joh turns around to see Stuart peaking down at her from the crest of our porch roof. Panic ensues. He’s fine, thanks.
Tomorrow I go up and screw the windows shut.
My Mom, after hearing the story, said “I know *exactly* how she feels.”
thane March 15th, 2008
Stuart pooped on the potty! Twice in two days! Today he announced ‘poop’. Johanna said ‘Stuart, do you want to poop on the potty?’ He got all excited, jumped out of bed and came downstairs. To the bathroom where dad got him up there and, low and behold, he pooped! And there was much rejoicing.
thane August 31st, 2006
Monroe, thank you. This is a beautiful thing. A truly beautiful legacy to leave for my son.
The Dead Milkmen play “Stuart” off of Beelzebubba
From PLLyrics.com
Now Stuart, if you look at the soil around any large U.S. city with a big
underground homosexual population – Des Moines, Iowa, perfect example.
Look at the soil around Des Moines, Stuart. You can’t build on it, you
can’t grow anything in it. The government says it’s due to poor farming.
But I know what’s really going on, Stuart. I know it’s the queers.
They’re in it with the aliens. They’re building landing strips for gay
Martians. I swear to God.You know what Stuart, I like you. You’re not like the other people, here
in the trailer park.