Stuart is from Portland

This morning, the children wanted (decaf) coffee with breakfast. After this was established, Joh tried to figure out what Stuart wanted for breakfast.

J: What do you want for breakfast, Stuart?
J: What do you want to eat with your coffee?
S: BAR!!!*
(A few minutes pass)
J: What do you want for breakfast, Stuart?
J: Do you want a fried egg sandwich with your coffee?
S: Uh, huh.

* Clif Cashew Nectar bars are Stuart’s favorite food, bar none.

Stuart Angry

Stuart was acting out. Hitting and throwing things, nothing unusual. I decided to talk to him about it. Afterwards I was saying:

Dad: When we are angry, we can say “I’m angry!”
Stuart: I’m angry!
D: “I want to use my hands.”
S: I want to use my hands.
D: “I want to throw things.”
S: I want to throw things.
D: “I’m going to the playroom to throw my beanbags.”
S: I’m going to the playroom to throw my beanbags.
D: Those are all things we can say when we are angry, Stuart.
S: “Those are all things we can say, Stuart.”

Demon Child

A short list of things Stuart did today.

  1. Took a loaf of bread at Nature Bake and started spinning it round and round.
  2. Again at NatureBake, took a stalk of wheat from a sheaf on the wall and beat it on the floor.
  3. Swept all the books off the coffee table onto the floor
  4. Took one of the sock monkey ornaments and dropped it in the toilet while Tory was pooping.
  5. Grabbed an unopened half galon of milk from the fridge and dropped it behind the couch, where it landed on some wall warts, which punched a hole in the bottom of it

Needless to say, it was a busy day.

Alpha and Omega

“I want to be last.”


I go down the stairs and he closes the gate.

“I want to be first.”

“Oh, I’m sorry. I thought when you said that you wanted to be last that you wanted to be last.”

Scrutinizing the Inscrutable

Dad: And who sends Angels to talk to people?

Girl: Jesus!

D: Right

Mom: Jesus wasn’t born yet. God sent the Angels.

D: God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit – the Triune. Three in one – they are all the same.

M: I don’t think that the cover the trinity in the [youngest Sunday school class].

D: We can try to teach her about the inscrutable. We tried to teach her about the election.

Trillium Bans Handheld Games

Tory’s school, Trillium Charter School, recently banned all handheld games. While this, in and of itself, is in no way unusual, how it came about is. Durring a recent all-school meeting, one of the second graders proposed the banning of these toys. The student body debated this proposal, with impassioned speaches for and against the ban. The body then voted and, by a narrow margin, banned them. Color me impressed.

UPS Confusion

We get a lot of stuff delivered. There’s the stuff we order online, the volume of which is probably significantly above average. Then there is the stuff from Apple for work. Lastly, there are the third parties who loan me things for testing. Anyway, Joh was joking the other day with the UPS guy that if we saw much more of him, she was going to have to invite him to Thanksgiving dinner. Last week, she goes to answer the door, and there is the UPS guy, laughing his fool head off. It seems that he had a package for the neighbors and had thought it was for our house at first glance.