Virginia’s Song

So, I got the following iChat from Sus.

Here’s a new song from Virg, she wants it to be on your blog.

Son dist, I love this song today…
It’s great to be something
And sing this song every day….
Will you head every day…
Do it today and tomorrow
It’s a great thing to do-hoo-hoo
And when you do it the best things
Do it the best thi-hii-hiings
And when you do it, it’s part to want it
Anybody will do it
And your connie will know it
And that’s the end of my so-o-ong!

Everybody knows it!

Virginia’s Quotations

One more from Sus.

I actually managed to write these down for once.



“Today’s the fitz fammy.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means that the show has beginned! And here… [Vanna wave] are all my wonderful creatures, marching around the room!”


“Know what I have?”
“Bugs in my hand.”


“When you go down and down and down and you plop on the road, I catch you in my arms on the sidewalk! And that’s amazing!”


“There was just a young show that I’ve never seen before. And it was dangerous…and I tried to watch it backwards…but it stumbled off in its own direction…so I just had to watch it.”

Lullabies by Virg

Another one from aunt Sus

So usually when I put Virginia to bed, I sing her some lullabies to help her get to sleep. Scarborough Fair, Rainbow Connection, Brahms’ Lullaby, whatever slow sleepy songs I can think of.

Well, lately, she’s taken to “helping” me with the lullabies. Aside from the fact that Virginia brainstorming lyrics is not exactly conducive to sleepiness, it’s pretty darned adorable. For instance, Brahms’ Lullay is now required to start like this:

Lullaby and goodnight
May your dreams come true…

The rest is up to me, but by God if her dreams don’t come true in that song, I’m in hot water.

Last night, however, we had a complete departure from the repertoire. Virginia decided that she needed to make up her own lullabies. And this is what we got:

If you have an egg
I’ll give you half a pie
And if you eat it up
I’ll give you another pie
And if you do that

–And another potential Top 40 Hit:

When you have a rainbow ball
You can give me lots of pens
And when you have a lot
You can give them to your daughter
And when you have a lot
You can give them to your daughter
And when the stars are over
You go to sleep.

So next time you’ve got a fussy child on your hands, by all means feel free to make use of one of these classics. Just be sure to say “Copyright Virginia Mellinger” at the end.


note to Tory from Virg

Got this in a e-mail from aunt Sus.

nyyyyhyyyyyybnhnyyyyyyyynnnnnnnnnnnnffyhhhhhhhhhhhhhyygnhy fgggggggggggggglllllllllllllllllllnhlbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbblnbtnubbbbbbbnbbbbbbbbbbbbybbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbynkkkkkkkk’,’,m,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, nnnnnnyyyyyyyyy yyyyt89t766666666666yyyyyyyyyy uhhhuuhyuyyyyyyuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuyyyyyyyyyuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuiuuuuuiuuuiggiiioigggggggkkkmmmnnn,m,k kjjjjjjjjjkkkkkkkkkkmjkmjmkmjknnjmmmmjjnnnnnnnnjjjjjjnjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjnnnnnnjjjjuytttttttiiiiuikjhhhhhhnuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnuuuyuuuuuiuyuuuuuuyuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuiiiuiiiuiioooooiniio,jkiuyyyuuuuuuiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiuui iuuuuuuuuuuuuuh hj8jj8uuuuuuuuuuuuuupuuhyyuyiiyhhiyujujuyu

Dear Tory,

I miss you so much. I hope you will be here, and nothing will be good without your Daddy. And this would be so good, very good, very very very good, and nothing would be good without your Daddy too! And so they went walking off in a great big museum. And this makes me happier than I ever felt before. And some things are not true in every line of this computer, and nothing is true when I do everything that Mommy does, and nothing is true unless I do it. I OK, I OK. And that means I love you in Spanish. And I really really do, so that’s why I do it. And this I-N-D means I love you in Spanish and in Arguld. And I love you and that’s true. Good night!

Softening the Blow

So, we were leaving the mall, and everyone was tired, hungry and touchy. I was holding StuBert and Joh was holding Tory's hand. Tory started… singing? Yelling? It's a fine line. Anyway, she is going full volume about 4 feet behind me. I popped a breaker.

"Tory! Please! Stop yelling!"

I immediately feel bad. Nothing like snapping at my girl to bring on the guild. Quickly, I come up with a plan to soften the blow.

"Tory. Stop talking. Stop thinking. Stop breathing. Stop smiling. Stop having fun. Stop walking."

"Daddy, I am having fun."

"Well stop it. And quit smiling."

Joh chimes in. "Don't get in the car."

"That's right. Stay out of the car and don't get in your car seat."

"I am in my car seat and having fun."

"Well, stop it."

Mission accomplished.

Blind One-Legged Albino Golfers

The internet is a beautiful thing. No matter how small your niche is, you can find the rest of them out there. You could be a blind, one-legged albino golfer. You get on the web, sign up for the newsletter, join the discussion forum, and you are part of a community. That is a wonderful thing.

StoryWhore v. The StoryWhore

So, as you may or may not know, there is another StoryWhore. I am stealing her name, best as I can. I don't feel bad about this, for a number of reasons:

1. We have different markets. Hers is readers of adult/pronographic fiction. Mine is… ah… me, I guess. And Tom. Probably my wif. OK, so those are not really different market segments, but mine is smaller.

2. She posted for two months in 2004. I am starting nearly 2 years after her last activity. If she had any contact info available, I would contact her and ask. She doesn't, so I can't. Unfortunately (or fortunately), there is no limit on blogger inactivity.

3. I couldn't come up with a better name.

My Name

This is the story of how I got my name. You want the facts, talk to someone else.

When I was born, the Nurses and Doctors pleaded with my mother: “You have to give him a name.” “We need a name to put on the birth certificate.”

My Mom: “I am not naming him. You do what you need to, but I am not getting into the middle of this.”

You see, my Father (Victor Thane Norton Jr.) had talked to my Granddaddy (Victor Thane Norton Sr.) and told him that he needed to visit my great uncle Homer, Granddaddy’s brother, who was on his death bed. If Granddaddy went to visit him, the boy would be named Victor Thane Norton III. Otherwise, Homer Scott Norton.

One might think that this was an easy choice. Not for Granddaddy.

I have heard that he was not on speaking terms with Homer, probably over a card game where Granddaddy was caught cheating. Regardless, Homer was in Chicago, and it was Winter. Whenever Granddaddy went to a city with snow, he got pneumonia. For those who have not had pneumonia, this is a serious concern, but that is a different story. However, Granddaddy wanted to have a III more than he wanted to stay healthy, so he went. He got in and out of that city as fast as he could, but he still got pneumonia.

And I got my name.

Tory and the Sprinkler

A few days ago, Tory asked Joh if she could use the sprinkler as a
mower (it looks like a shower-head on a long handle). Joh said yes,
and Tory began walking around the yard with it. Soon she was running
with it and, wouldn't you know it, *POW*, it hits something. Well,
the base of it popped her right in the mons. OUCH! Well, when I put
her to bed, there was a nice circular bruise. Poor girl.

Tory’s first dentist appointment

So, Tory went to the dentist yesterday. Nothing much to tell, except that John Furz's friend Sammer was her dentist. "I have a picture of you with my dog" I believe was the quote.