Giant Robot
thane May 19th, 2009
Girl: What if a giant came who was so big he could step down from the sky.
Dad: Guaranteed the US Government would shoot missles at it.
Girl: What?
Mom: Honey, do you remember the movie “The Iron Giant”?
Archive for the 'Lazy Bastard' Category
John Madden Football
thane April 27th, 2009
With the announcement of John Madden’s retirement, I found myself wondering if he will continue to be the EA poster child for football. Will there be a John Madden 2010 football game. I see no reason they should stop. Frankly, I see no reason for them to stop even if he shoul pass from this mortal coil. Not that I would want anything to happen to him, but I thing that John Madden 2030 NFL Zombie Apocolipse could be one of the best things to happen to sports games. You could pick and chose dead players from the past to be on your team, feeding them cheerleaders and Hollywood stars at the half.
When Stuart was a Cat
thane April 24th, 2009
Today with Stuart:
“When I was a cat and Mac was a Stuart, I scratched the carpet. But now I am a Stuart and I don’t scratch the carpet.”
New Site
(Not) a Snow Day
thane January 16th, 2007
So I checked to see if the office was closed Today, I just checked too early. Usually 7:00 is a fine time to check, but Today they changed the message at 7:45. (sigh) Tory is home from school and I could go home too. Why don’t I? Well, for one, I spent 15 min watching a truck unblock 165th. It had gotten itself stuck across both lanes. You can file that under SUCK! Since I am already here, I might as well catch up on the news and my mail, drink my coffee, warm up, and let the roads clear. The other reason is that Today is the day I scheduled to stay late to work on my homework. Might as well do that now and then go home. Maybe I can help Tory make a snowman.
One Fried Helicopter
The Road to Success
thane December 18th, 2006
I heard something I found amusing, in a painful sort of way.
from
ajc.com
Asked if any of the recommendations he’s heard so far were new to him, Bush said, “I’ve heard some ideas that would lead to defeat.”
“And I reject those ideas, ideas such as leaving before the job is done, ideas such as not helping this (Iraqi) government take the necessary and hard steps to be able to do its job,” Bush said.
I have also heard “some ideas that would lead to defeat.” What I have not heard are any ideas that would lead to success. If all options are bad, Mr. Bush, should we not seek to choose the least bad option? If all roads lead to defeat, should we not just lose and get it over with? Then, at least, we can go win at something else.
Democrats Call for More Effort
thane December 17th, 2006
As the chairman of the “Just get something done” party, I am in favor of the Democrats new position on the congressional work week. While having a job that is Monday through Friday sucks, as their employer, I expect nothing less. Also, starting on the 4th of January instead of the end of the month is a positive move. One Republican in Congress made the mistake of saying: “Marriages suffer. The Democrats couldn’t care less about families — that’s what this says.” This was rebutted by just about everyone, but the members of the military I think had the best response.
What kind of Pirate am I?
thane December 15th, 2006
Apparently, you, fair readers, are the only ones who can decide.
What kind of pirate am I? You decide!
You can also view a breakdown of results or put one of these on your own page!
Brought to you by Rum and Monkey
Music Meme
thane November 30th, 2006
It goes from Jenel to Phil to Tom to Me to the Cleaners
“You go here, find the year you turned 18, then C&P the results. Bold the one’s you liked and strike the one’s that made your ears bleed.”
Adapting what Tom did, I have italicized those songs/artists whom I did not recognize.
1. That’s What Friends Are For – Dionne & Friends
2. Addicted To Love – Robert Palmer
3. Kiss – Prince
4. Walk This Way – Run D.M.C./Aerosmith
5. Living In America – James Brown
6. Take My Breath Away – Berlin
7. Burning Heart – Survivor
8. Walk Like An Egyptian – The Bangles
9. The Sweetest Taboo – Sade
10. You Give Love A Bad Name – Bon Jovi
11. Higher Love – Steve Winwood
12. Never As Good As The First Time – Sade
13. Greatest Love Of All – Whitney Houston
14. Tarzan Boy – Baltimora
15. Sledgehammer – Peter Gabriel
16. You’re A Friend Of Mine – Clarence Clemons & Jackson Browne
17. Manic Monday – The Bangles
18. Glory Of Love – Peter Cetera
19. Like A Rock – Bob Seger
20. I Knew The Bride (When She Used To Rock and Roll) – Nick Lowe
21. Word Up – Cameo
22. Conga – Miami Sound Machine
23. The Men All Pause – Klymaxx
24. In Your Eyes – Peter Gabriel
25. Live To Tell – Madonna
26. Dancing On The Ceiling – Lionel Richie
27. Venus – Bananarama
28. Typical Male – Tina Turner
29. Take Me Home Tonight – Eddie Money
30. Rock Me Amadeus – Falco
31. I Can’t Wait – Nu Shooz
32. If You Leave – O.M.D.
33. You Be Illin’ – Run DMC
34. Crush On You – The Jets
35. The Rain – Oran “Juice” Jones
36. Papa Don’t Preach – Madonna
37. Mad About You – Belinda Carlisile
38. R.O.C.K. In The USA – John “Cougar” Melloncamp
39. Danger Zone – Kenny Loggins
40. Words Get In The Way – Miami Sound Machine
41. Walk Of Life – Dire Straits
42. I’m Your Man – Wham!
43. West End Girls – Pet Shop Boys
44. All Cried Out – Lisa Lisa & Cult Jam With Full Force
45. We Don’t Have To Take Our Clothes Off – Jermaine Stewart
46. My Hometown – Bruce Springsteen
47. On My Own – Patti LaBelle & Michael McDonald
48. Everybody Have Fun Tonight – Wang Chung
49. All I Need Is A Miracle – Mike & the Mechanics
50. Tuff Enuff – Fabulous Thunderbirds
51. The Future’s So Bright I Gotta Wear Shades- Timbuk3
52. Love Walks In – Van Halen
53. Shot In The Dark – Ozzie Osbourne
54. The Next Time I Fall – Peter Cetera & Amy Grant
55. Move Away – Culture Club
56. Day By Day – Hooters
57. Rumors – Timex Social Club
58. I Wanna Be A Cowboy – Boys Don’t Cry
59. The Power Of Love – Jennifer Rush
60. One Step Closer – Gavin Christopher
61. A Love Bizarre – Sheila E.
62. Everybody Dance – Ta Mara and the Seen
63. Sex As A Weapon – Pat Benatar
64. Superbowl Shuffle – Chicago Bears
65. Live Is Life – Opus
66. Great Gosh A’Mighty – Little Richard
67. Jungle Boy – John Eddie
68. Crazay – Jesse Johnson and Sly Stone
69. More Than Physical – Bananarama
70. Baby Talk – Alisha
71. Pleasure and Pain – Divinyls
72. Don Quichotte – Magazine 60
73. Why Can’t This Be Love – Van Halen
74. Once In A Lifetime – Talking Heads
75. Caravan of Love – Isley Jasper Isley