The Nortons

Archive for December, 2007

Political Daughter

thane December 30th, 2007

My daughter is training to be Attorney General of the U.S. of A. When asked where a particular member of a nondescript class of objects might be, she responded thusly:

I don’t know what you are talking about, and whatever you are talking about, I don’t know where it is.

Utilikilt Mocumertials

thane December 29th, 2007

How awesome is this:

http://www.utilikilts.com/?page_id=10

Ultimate GF Bread Machine Recipe

thane December 29th, 2007

We have a GF (Gluten Free) bread recipe that is so good that no one in the house eats glutenous bread anymore. Additionally, it is really simple. This all started by finding a recipe over at the GF Guru. We had some problems with consistency, so we started playing with the instructions almost immediately.

Mix well

1 2/3 c Milk: This changes based on the type of milk and the type of flour. Offhand I would say use 1/6 c less if you use brown rice flour, and 1/3 c less if you use rice milk. YMMV.
1 egg

Place mixed liquid into bread machine pan. Add, in this order

1 T Oil (We use olive)
4 t Caster Sugar (aka. superfine sugar)
3/4 t Sea Salt
2 c Rice Flour: Best flavor and texture seems to be half white rice flour and half brown rice flour
1 T Bob’s Red Mill All Purpose Gluten Free Flour: It makes the loaf brown better and rise better. Feel free to leave it out.
2 t Xanthan Gum
1 t Bread Machine Yeast

We cook it on the longest setting our machine has. The stuff has some trouble browning.

Biblical Law

thane December 29th, 2007

I saw this cartoon about christians, and it shows the problem with taking the bible too literally. It also gave me an idea. Anyone who wants to pass legislation founded on their reading of the Bible should have to pass the tests of Mark 16:17-18.

Passage Mark 16:17-18 (New International Version)
“¹⁷And these signs will accompany those who believe: In my name they will drive out demons; they will speak in new tongues; ¹⁸they will pick up snakes with their hands; and when they drink deadly poison, it will not hurt them at all; they will place their hands on sick people, and they will get well.”

I am willing to forgo most of these tests, however, you must drink a glass of the following:

After you have finished the glass, if you can read the text of your bill, I will vote for it.

P.S. It should be noted that I hold no grudge against legislation inspired by the Bible (or any book). However, if you cannot back up your arguments with something stronger than “because it says so”, then I think that this rule should apply.